Loofahs Are Disgusting, so We Found Your Next Shower Companion

Photo: Getty/ MoMo Productions

Recently I found an anemone-esque disk suctioned to a bathroom that I was occupying for a weekend away: red, precarious, and with little divets all around it. It seemed to be friendly, but I, stuck with my sad travel loofah, didn't touch it. And then like a modern love story in the making, the Boie shower scrubber ($8) found its way back to me through a targeted ad. 

If you’ve not yet been acquainted, the disk is an exfoliating, antimicrobial, and delightfully flexible alternative to loofahs (boo) and washcloths (double boo). Oh right—I hate being very Bad News Bears about this, but loofahs are factually disgusting. Jason Tetro, a microbiologist and author of The Germ Files, previously told Well+Good that loofahs are a veritable bacteria fiesta (okay, my words, not his). And studies support this, adding an extra element of terror: After 10 short days bacteria tends to multiply and party hard. Not even a full two weeks! In conclusion: awful, gross, and I hate it. 

So back to me being naked with my sea creature scrubber. The disk is made of a rubberlike material called thermoplastic elastomer that makes it 100 percent recyclable and down to curve and bend on your body. And ooh! It can handle whatever your favorite body wash is for the ultimate sudsy experience. A fun and sexy running joke is that in my life is that I never feel thoroughly clean (nor do my bathroom surroundings), and consequently, reset. No matter how much I put bleach to the tiles, my faucets are always growing beards, my drains feel disgusting, and it’s hard to wash off my anxieties (and probably, New York city subway grime). 

But when I slid this multi-pronged scrubber over my skin, it gave me the delightful sensation of scrubbing my troubles (and all those subway germs) away. Because it has all these little baby octopus arms, I felt as though centuries of past-due epidermal flakes were being rubbed off (mentally—I did not witness this transit). Throughout the shower and after, my skin felt pliable, smooth, and luxuriated in a way that felt totally foreign. And when I was finished, I didn’t have to put it back over any mold-encrusted faucets—it could go SMACK, back on the wall.

I’ve kept this on the DL because, I don't know, I don't talk extensively about my showering habits. However, there’s no reason to keep a good body scrubber hidden from a world where loofahs are boldly breeding bacteria. So if you want to get your own friendly body wash anemone, make sure to put in your order now—the high-in-demand product takes 48 hours to ship.

That's eight days from full loofah fiesta, guys!

When you get out of the shower, derms say you should neglect this one-step skincare routine. And looking to get even dirtier in the shower? We break down why shower sex can make you feel even closer to your partner.

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