Seeing a new hairstylist? Here’s Jonathan Van Ness’ top tip for nailing the consultation

Hairstylist and celeb Jonathan Van Ness‘ mane is the stuff of beauty legends. (I mean, has the grooming guru with the shiniest strands had a bad hair day in his life? Ever?) Since the Queer Eye star has gained notoriety for refashioning even the most unkempt of manes into Patrick Dempsey-level hairdos, I couldn’t resist asking him about the best strategies for collaborating successfully with a new hairstylist. Because entrusting someone new with your tresses can totally elicit some feelings of stranger danger.

“I’m most off put by a new client who sits down and immediately says ‘no hairdresser gets it right.’ Don’t open new relationship by explaining why the last one didn’t work,” Van Ness straight-up preaches. After all, you wouldn’t (or rather shouldn’t) start a first date by agonizing over your last S.O.’s shortcomings. So, the same logic applies here.

“Don’t say ‘do whatever you want!’ You have a baseline understanding of what you’re looking for—collaboration is what you’re looking for.” —Jonathan Van Ness

Once you sit down, great attitude and all, set into motion Van Ness’ next tip for making the most magic happen: Bring lots of pictures and show your new hair guru. “Don’t say ‘do whatever you want!’ You have a baseline understanding of what you’re looking for—collaboration is what you’re looking for,” he says. In other words: Own that haircut, honey! Walking out with a fresh snip that makes you feel effervescent starts with asking for exactly what you want.

When you’re picking out a photo of a Jenna Dewan-inspired bob or a model rocking the perfect fringe, do bear in mind that the texture of your hair might mean the end result won’t be an exact replica of the style. (Yet another facet of your new #lewk you can and should ask your stylist to help you work through.)

With any luck, you’ll walk out of the salon with a gorgeous cut that gives even JVN a run for his well-groomed locks.

If you’re taking the plunge and getting bangs, here are the best ones for your face shape and the lazy girl-approved method for styling them flawlessly.