Good Friends Are Hard to Come by—Here’s What to Look for in One, According to Your MBTI Profile

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Ever notice how some friends turn your energy up a notch, and others have more of a calming effect on you? What about the friends who bring over the pints of nice cream as soon as they find out you and your S.O. broke up versus those who drag you out to the bar and don’t ask questions? All your friends all have their strengths—but some of those strengths may benefit you more than others.

Every Myers-Briggs personality type has a different set of core needs based on intellectual, social, and emotional profiles. (Don’t know what your MBTI is? Read this first!) Luckily, there are types out there who complement your specific needs and thus hold the power to dramatically improve your life. So without further ado, keep on reading to find out who should be your bestie, based on your Myers-Briggs personality type.

The top traits to look for in a bestie, according to your Myers-Briggs personality type.

the guardians
Graphic by Well+Good Creative


You may not be the first to jump into a new activity or to take initiative in meeting new people, but even though you’re shy, you're an inherently a social being. You thrive when you’re surrounded by people you love and people who help you see the world in new ways. ESFPs and ESTPs are the quintessential social butterflies of the MBTI system, and they can teach you to be more spontaneous and crash that party you were too afraid to attend alone.


You, ESFJ, are surrounded by friends at all time. But the friends you get the most back from are introspective beings who help you identify the needs you rarely pause to recognize that you have. You find kinship in the structured, social energy of INFJs and ENFJs, but they also help you understand your feelings on a deeper level.


ISTJs value stability in their friendships and gravitate toward types who stick to the commitments they make. Other J-types (judgment) provide you with the social consistency you crave, especially those with whom you share core values. You’ll align well with ESTJs and INTJs as friends.


For how intense they are at work, ESTJs are really low-key when they’re off the clock. Go-with-the-flow friends usually help you unwind the best, as well as those who will head off on big adventures with you. You’ll probably feel right at home when you're surrounded by the exploratory energy of ISTPs, ESTPs and ENTPs.

the artisans
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You don’t have time to dwell on your feelings because you’d much rather be chasing a dream, a party, or a goal. It’s all about expansion for you, ESFP. As such, types who aren’t content to sit still all day, and perhaps even experience the world in a way you don't, complement you best. If you want to book an international vacay, take your other ISFP and ESFP friends with. And if you want to learn something new, hang out with an ENFP.


ISFPs prefer spontaneity to stability, adventure to chill, so they need fun friends who still appreciate them on the deepest level. You feel close to ESFPs and ESTPs when you’re looking to be the life of the party, but you may gravitate toward INTJs and INFPs when you have a problem and want to feel understood.


ESTPs are truly everyone’s friends—and they want all the social attention possible. But when the spotlight is not on you and you’re not working a room, you need a friend who will push you to access rather than repress your emotions. You're great at understanding the dynamics of the world around you, but you struggle to let your feelings affect you. You can learn a lot from INFJs and INFPs, even if the territory feels unnerving.


ISTPs don’t thrive on deep, lasting emotional bonds so much as shared hobbies and adventures—and that's how they like it. Other S-types (sensing) feel easy to communicate with and understand, and T-types (thinking) don’t overwhelm you. You likely find the most camaraderie with ESTJs, ISTJs, and ESTPs.

the idealists
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You spend so much time cheering on others by coaching and supporting them, but you rarely get back what you put out in an emotional sense, even though you need the same support in return. That's why the friends you need most are the ones who will lift you up when you’re feeling hurt. INFJs and ESFJs are best for emotional healing, but you can rely on INTJs to truly “get” your complexity.


INFPs can have deep conversations with complete strangers at a bar. You're never lacking for emotional intimacy in your friendships, whether old, new, casual or deeply acquainted. The friend you need, though, won’t force you to emote all the time as you are used to doing. You actually feel the most balanced when you’re out in the world experiencing and learning. ISTPs are great pals for getting you out of your head, which is what you very much need to prioritize doing.


You appreciate all your friends for the different ways they add to your life, but you do well with at least one friend who helps to shield you from overthinking, which is your Achilles’ heel. INTPs are adept for helping you process your worries and anxieties quickly; they are highly logical, and can break down a problem into easily digestible pieces so you can tackle it without letting emotions get the best of you.


Romantically, INFJs often gravitate toward those who are different, like quirky ENTPs or smooth-talking ESTPs. But when it comes to friendship, you are all about similarity. You value those who like to plan, always keep promises, and can talk endlessly about wide-ranging topics like celeb gossip and science. ENFJs and INTJs are similar in just the right ways for a blossoming friendship.

the rationalists
Graphic by Well+Good Creative


INTJs choose their friends carefully and selectively; you don’t squander time, and you don’t trust just anyone. More than anything, you want to surround yourself with people who will both inspire you and understand that most of your depth lies well beneath your cool surface. ENTJs are your best work buddies, helping you climb the ladder professionally, and INFPs can help you access your hidden feelings and honor them in your decision-making prowess.


You often choose friends who can keep up with you intellectually. Whether it’s an outlandish theory or dissecting the latest political conspiracy, you crave relationships with people who'll indulge your wild thoughts over a couple beers. ENTPs and INTJs can feed your mind in exciting new ways.


ENTPs bond really well with almost everyone they meet. You likely have 10 friends you could call on a given night to just get out of the house. Still, you rarely meet people who have the appropriate centering effect on you—and if you find one, hold onto ‘em. While you could have casual fun with almost any type, INTJs and INFJs are consistently great sources of conversation and food for thought.


ENTJs like to work hard and play hard, but while you’re social, you’re also the most responsible of your friends. You like balance among your friends; those who can propel you toward new goals, as well as allow you to let your hair down. You likely share hobbies and interests ESTPs and ISTPs, but you also appreciate INTJs when it comes to understanding emotions or talking about matters of career.

Want more Myers-Briggs intel? Here’s what your MBTI means for your love language. And here’s the best way to start your day, according to your type.

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