For some vulva-owners, oral sex functions mostly as an A+ sexual appetizer. For others, it’s the dessert you treat yourself to because you didn’t really enjoy the dinner enough to begin with. And for many, it’s the main, delicious course. But if you’re ordering the same thing again and again when you eat out (and/or when your partner(s) does, if you know what I mean), oral sex runs the risk of losing its novelty. That’s why knowing different oral sex positions can come in handy.
Whether you’re giving or receiving—but particularly if you’re receiving—a shift as small as changing your position can prove to be a big pleasure win that also reinvigorates your oral-sex play with some new excitement. Furthermore, if you’re a vulva-owner who has a harder time reaching orgasm to begin with, varying the types and techniques of stimulation used during oral-sex play can also prove effective. To start, consider trying the Kivin Method, which is said to bring vulva-owners to orgasm in five minutes or less.
For some specific guidance on different oral sex positions to try to shake up your routine and also bring you more pleasure, Jess O’Reilly, PhD, resident sexologist at Astroglide and host of the @SexWithDrJess podcast shares six options below that all vulva-owners can add to their sexual menu. Bon appétit.
6 different oral sex positions to try for increased pleasure and excitement.
1. Lie back and take it
Forewarning: You’ll need a headboard for this move. “Sit back, against the headboard, with your feet on the mattress, and your knees bent,” says Dr. O’Reilly. “Prop yourself up on a few pillows, if you like, and simply lie back and let them do all the work. Enjoy the ride and the view. Tune into every sensation and don’t worry about reciprocating.”
2. The grinder
“Lie on your stomach, with your hips propped up on a pillow,” Dr. O’Reilly says. “Let your partner climb between your legs and use your hand or a toy to rub yourself from the front, as they lick, suck, and caress from behind. Grinding against your pubic mound can pull on the hood of the clitoris, which stimulates the inner erectile tissue of the clitoral shaft.”
3. The tee
“Lie on your back with one leg outstretched and the other bent with your foot on the mattress,” Dr. O’Reilly says. “Have your partner approach from the side by sliding beneath your bent leg, so that your bodies form the shape of a tee. If you like having your lips [or labia majora] squeezed together, they can use their lips to do so while they run their tongue between the groove.”
“Sit on your throne facing in either direction, and grind while they kiss, lick, suck, swirl, and glide against you,” Dr. O’Reilly says.
Standing is a great, low-effort way to experience oral sex in a way that might help you feel more powerful. “Lean against the wall and have [your partner(s)] drop to their knees,” Dr. O’Reilly says. “Play with the dominant position as you make requests—or demands, with consent—and guide their head to your own delight.”
This position is really about flipping the whole 69 concept on its head. “Your partner lies on their back,” says Dr. O’Reilly. “You lie on your back on top of them with your crotch in their face. Pull away and press toward them to control the pressure, movement, rhythm and depth.”
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