Sex Advice

6 Benefits of Sexual Massage, According to Sex Experts

Lola Méndez

Photo: Stocksy / Sergey Filimonov
Sexual massage can be a powerful tool for those who feel disconnected from themselves or their partners. It involves sensual touches on the entire body, including erectile tissue—nipples, penis, vulva, and clitoris. The intimate, ancient Tantric massage helps people to focus on the sensations that arise in the genitals during arousal. This type of bodywork can be informative, erotic, playful, and sensual.

But the perks of the practice don't end there. We spoke to sex experts who shared lots of titillating intel about how incorporating this form of physical touch into your sex life can take it to an entirely new, more embodied level.

6 ways sexual massage can make physical intimacy more pleasurable

1. You'll form a deeper understanding of arousal

“With our skin being our largest sex organ, sexual massage can deepen a person’s experience of pleasure, as well as ignite sexual connection for a couple,” says Irene Fehr, a sex and intimacy coach. “When done for the pleasure of massage (and not to only get a partner to climax), it can lead the receiver and the giver to higher levels of connection, passion, and arousal.”

2. It'll help you get out of your head

The pressure to perform may distract some people during sex, making it harder for them to climax. “Because sexual massage is typically done one person at a time (one person gives and the other receives), it creates a conscious connection between the giver and the receiver. You do it with lights on, which makes it extra vulnerable, as well as exciting,” Fehr says.

3. Sex massage improves communication

Sexual massage allows partners to vocalize their needs and give adjustments without worrying about hurting their partner's feelings. “It takes time (45 minutes to an hour), which allows for profound relaxation and a sense of safety,” Fehr says. “It boosts oxytocin, which is a powerful bonding chemical that’s released during orgasm. The slow and prolonged nature of the practice also creates a natural state of altered consciousness, including feelings of euphoria, openness, and general pleasure, without resorting to the use of drugs or alcohol.”

4. It also intensifies your bond with your partner

The intimacy created through sexual massage with your partner increases your connection. “It allows you to spend time together in close proximity, exploring and appreciating each other's bodies," says Tatyana Dyachenko, a sex and relationship expert. There’s also an element of vulnerability with it, as more often than not, you’ll be completely naked. Being vulnerable with your partner shows a good level of emotional stability and trust,”

5. Massage in general is good for your body, mind, and soul

“A massage of any type is good for your general wellbeing,” Dyachenko says. “The lymphatic systems within our bodies often get blocked due to diet, fast-paced lifestyles, stress, and anxiety. Massage can help to release any blockages and reduce tension. When you receive a massage, it helps to improve your circulation and relieves any pain you might have. Massage also releases our feel-good hormones into our body, such as serotonin. This makes us feel happier and healthier, and when we feel like that, we’re more likely to want to have sex.”

6. Erotic bodywork can jump-start your libido

“If you’ve not been feeling horny of late, a sexual massage can really get you in the mood," Dyachenko says. "You can start with a normal massage to help you relax and then take it from there."

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