Given that fewer than 20 percent of vulva-owners can orgasm from penetration alone, it makes sense that what helps build more pleasurable orgasms isn't so much different positions, but what's happening during penetration. (Hint: Let's not forget that clitoral stimulation has been found to be the fastest route to orgasm.) Furthermore, "now that [the sexual penetration techniques] have names, we can more freely try them, talk about them, and ask our partners to do the techniques with us," Christiana von Hippel, ScD, former research scientist for OMGyes, a sexual-education platform aimed to help vulva-owners maximize their pleasure.
Remember that sex is full of funny sounds and smells, sometimes vagina smells, so it's never a bad idea to switch things up. So if you're not getting off like you used to while masturbating with your go-to toy (because vulva-owners can absolutely use these techniques with a toy during solo play) or you and your partner are in a sexual rut, considering other sexual penetration methods may bring more, ahem, depth to your sessions. Below, find 11 sexual penetration techniques that can really shake things up in the bedroom.
11 sexual penetration techniques to try for boundless pleasure
Shallowing is essentially a strategic take on "just the tip" in that it includes different ways of stimulating the first inch of the vaginal entrance. According to Sadie Allison, PhD, sexologist and co-founder of GoLove CBD lubricant, you can tap into a whole lot of pleasure endings without ever wading into the deep end.
"The majority of the nerves in the vagina are in the first third, so that area is hyper-sensitive, and can often be more receptive to touch—making shallow penetration particularly pleasurable," she says. "The head of the penis is also more sensitive, containing 4,000 orgasmic nerve endings that trigger climax, than the shaft, so this technique can hyper-concentrate sensation."
Pairing focuses on different ways to stimulate the clitoris during penetration. "While 18 percent of women experience orgasms during penetration1 without any clitoral stimulation, about four times as many women say that clitoral stimulation during intercourse is either necessary for orgasm or makes their orgasms better," Dr. Von Hippel says.
In addition to using hands, a small vibe can help in achieving this. Think: a chic, subtle wearable like Unbound's Palma ($99) ring or Crave's Vesper Vibrator Necklace ($69). Both are great for additional clitoral stimulation to pair with penetration.
3. Staying In
Staying in refers to the ways two pelvises can stay in contact and grind together instead of going in and out. This sexual penetration technique embraces the stimulation of friction, and there are several motions and angles that can elevate the experience.
"The muscle group your kegels are flexing or squeezing are the pubococcygeus muscles, aka your orgasm muscles," says Dr. Allison. "The penis-owner can literally feel your PC muscles squeezing their penis if you both stay still and you squeeze. You can feel the penis-owner do it, too, as both genitalia have the same orgasm muscle."
This is all about applying wider, thicker pressure to the clitoris during penetration instead of poking at it, which can sometimes be a little too intense. To try it, someone can start rubbing the vulva with the tip of the finger, then the pad of the fingers, then to two or three fingers spread.
This method also works with a toy or penis, or even during oral sex. A technique like the Kivin Method or horizontal oral has the tongue flat and broadened over the vulva, which can have the effect of making someone climax in a few minutes flat.
Put those kegels to work! Flexing is a penetration technique that involves squeezing the vaginal muscles as if to egg on an orgasm. And, heads up: Sometimes this can lead to an orgasm lasting longer.
"This motion with the vulva can lead to a slow-build orgasm," says Dr. Allison. "Flexing your kegels also strengthens them, which has been shown to lead to more pleasurable sex and stronger orgasms."
This technique calls upon the G-spot, which OMGyes outlines as more of a region than a go-to pleasure button. The G-region is understood to be approximately a few inches deep on the front or top wall of the vagina, but instead of searching for a specific "spot," you want to stimulate the area until you feel something. A toy like Dame's Arc ($115) is perfectly curved to target the top wall and find what stirs someone.
This refers to ways partners can tilt their pelvises to direct more pressure to the clitoris or G-region. To reap the full benefits of angling, consider getting yourself a sex pillow. An angular, sturdy cushion like Dame's Pillo ($95) can help someone adjust the depth of penetration and redirect the penetration to hit your more covert erotic spots.
The first moment of penetration can feel exciting because of the highly anticipated "oomph" feeling, but that repetition can become routine. Renewing acts as a prolonged a sexual intermission that can make it feel like the very first time and build intimacy by adding a teasing element to your sex play.
"The action of pausing also allows us to take ourselves out of the 'goal oriented' narrative that often comes with sex, especially P-in-V penetrative sex," says Dr. Allison. "It gives us a chance to pause, take note of our emotions and sensations, and mix up the script rather than race to the finish."
This is about bringing in anal stimulation into sex play. There are plenty of ways to do that, including manual stimulation, or you can introduce a toy into the mix. A luxe vibrating butt plug like the b-vibe Rimming Plug Petite ($145) can simulate rimming (ahem, that's anal oral) while someone is being simultaneously penetrated.
Adding is about, well, adding into the vagina to provide a sense of fullness. You can accomplish this with digital penetration, by adding additional fingers, and by using compatible toys. The We-Vibe Sync ($149), for example, can be inserted internally as a companion to P-in-V penetration and can (joyfully) provide clitoral vibrations at the same time, as can the Satisfyer Partner Whale ($16). It's fullness with fringe benefits!
11. Deep end
Deep-ending refers to reaching a vulva-owner's cervix. Before trying it with a partner, though, sexperts recommend that you test the waters on your own. And when going at it with a partner, wait until you're fully aroused before inserting a long, G-spot-reaching toy like We-Vibe Rave ($119).
- Herbenick, Debby et al. “Women’s Experiences With Genital Touching, Sexual Pleasure, and Orgasm: Results From a U.S. Probability Sample of Women Ages 18 to 94.” Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy, vol. 44, no. 2, 2017, https://doi.org/10.1080/0092623X.2017.1346530.
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