Let's talk about sex, ladies—or rather, listen to some pro advice from Lila Darville. The Magic Mike Live founder, relationship coach, and Well+Good Council member has some mind-blowing news about orgasms you need to know about.
Everybody knows about the G-spot (that pleasure zone inside your vagina made up of erectile tissue and nerve endings). People tend to think it’s a magic sex button—a tried-and-true way to get yours, à la Meg Ryan in When Harry Met Sally. (You know, that deli scene.) But, in fact, there are a lot of different areas within the vagina that are highly orgasmic—namely, the A-spot and the PS-spot.
Not familiar? Consider them the G-spot’s lesser-known—but equally hot—siblings, AKA erogenous areas with concentrated nerve endings inside the vagina. And you should get to know them, because if you're focusing solely on the OG (er, spot), you're missing out.
If you have the expectation that you can only orgasm from one particular area—like the G-spot or the clitoris—then you're really blocking your ability to feel anything new or unexpected.
If you have the expectation that you can only orgasm from one particular area—like the G-spot or the clitoris—then you're really blocking your ability to feel anything new or unexpected; it limits your curiosity and your ability to discover new areas that could be really pleasurable. I liken it to going to Paris. Can you imagine if you went to Paris and all you ever did was go to see the Eiffel Tower? There's this whole city to be explored.
Ready to expand your orgasmic alphabet? Here's your guide to the sexiest “new” spots to find in bed.
What is the A-spot?
Short for anterior fornix, the A-spot is the innermost point deep within the vagina, right in front of the cervix.
How do you find it?
The A-spot is quite deeper inside the front (or anterior) wall than the G-spot. If the rule for finding your G-spot is slipping a finger about two inches inside your vagina and making a "come-hither" motion; the same goes for the A-Spot, except insert your finger (or his or her finger, their penis or a sex toy, you get the idea) more deeply.
The best positions for the A-Spot
During missionary sex, pull your knees up toward your chest—this shortens the vagina for easier access. Or, angle your body back while on top with a male partner—making for deeper penetration and tilting his penis upward toward the A-spot.
Why A-spot orgasms are A-plus
With the A-spot, you're fully penetrated and the sensation's deeper within the body than the G. Energetically, it can be more of a full-body experience than the explosive G-spot orgasm. Plus, a lot of people aren’t actually comfortable with G-spot stimulation—with the urethra right near it, it can feel like a mild sensation of needing to pee.
What is the PS-spot?
The PS-spot is opposite the G spot—on the exterior wall of the vagina, closer to your anus, which has a lot of super-sexy nerve endings to explore. Like the G- and A-spots, it’s made up of erectile tissue and swells and protrudes into the vagina itself when you’re fully aroused.
How do you find it?
If you turned your hand around from the G-spot and pressed down, that’s the PS-spot.
The best positions for the PS-spot
From-behind or spoon-position sex both allow for penetration angled closer to the PS-spot.
Why PS-spot orgasms are crazy-good
It’s a more mellow, relaxing sensation than the kind of peaking energy of a G-spot orgasm (because the G-spot is, in part, an extension of clitoral nerves, it creates that classic climactic feeling). PS-spot pleasure is another tingle to explore.
In short, don’t stop at striving for just one type of orgasm in bed. Collect them all…and enjoy the journey along the way.
An expert on sex and intimacy, professional relationship coachLila Darville brings her body-positive, real-talk approach to stadiums full of women as the pleasure director of a show in Las Vegas called Magic Mike Live.
What should Lila write about next? Send your questions and suggestions to firstname.lastname@example.org.
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