Sex Advice

It’s International Masturbation Day, and Ethical Porn Site Bellesa Wants Us All To Come Together for It

Erica Sloan

Getty Images/Westend61
Look back at the past year with a sexual lens (bear with me), and it almost feels like foreplay for some big moment of release. Human touch (at least, beyond your immediate pod) was taboo, we had ample time for sex-ploration at home, and we became pros at doing almost anything separately (but together in spirit). Now, it is International Masturbation Day and ethical porn site Bellesa has given us precisely the climax we’ve all been building up to: a worldwide virtual masturbate-a-thon.

Puns aside, in a post-quarantine world, a masturbate-a-thon feels incredibly fitting—after all, you can join in from your bed—and while we surely do not need any sort of holiday as a reason to engage in self-pleasure, knowing that it’s International Masturbation Day definitely doesn’t hurt. What’s more, Bellesa’s masturbate-a-thon has the very exhilarating goal of breaking the world record for the most women masturbating at once. (They’ve already surpassed 300,000 sign-ups, and they’re shooting for 350,000!) This is actually incredibly important and meaningful, given that the orgasm gap is a very real thing for heterosexual women in particular.

If you’re feeling a little stripped of sexual inspiration these days, Bellesa is also offering an exclusive pay-whatever-you-want deal for the rest of Masturbation May (yes, we’ll be calling it that from here on out). You’ll get access to the site’s deep archive of ethical female-pleasure-driven porn, as well as audio erotica and a whole host of sex guides created by sex therapists.

Looking for ways to take your solo sex over the top? We’ve rounded up a few of our most tried-and-true masturbation tips from sexologists and sex educators.

Below, self-pleasure tips for International Masturbation Day—or really, any day:

1. Level up your sex-toy game.

Sure, you can take yourself straight to O-land with nothing but a bare hand and a dream, but involving a sex toy—and not just any sex toy, but a truly revolutionary one—can make your trip a true joyride. These were the sex toys that lifted us out of the touch-less quarantine doldrums (no easy task), and if you’re going to buy just one, make it this inclusive, ergonomic winner from Maude.

2. Or, fall in love all over again with your go-to toy.

If you had a good thing going with a particular sex toy but your relationship seems to have fizzled, reignite the orgasmic spark by following these tips for switching up your masturbation routine, from sexologist Caitlin V, MPH.

3. Invite your whole body to the sex party.

Why should your clitoris get all the fun? Stimulating multiple different erogenous zones—like the nipples, thighs, and labia—in a solo sex session can exponentially increase the level of pleasure that you feel by adding to the number of sensations rippling through your nerve endings. (You could even try some lesser-known spots like the space between your breasts or your eyelids.)  If you’re wondering how to manage all this touching while also showing your clitoris the TLC it deserves, consider working one of these innovative sex toys into your routine—all of which are designed specifically to involve various non-clit body parts (did someone say anal play?)

4. Get creative with your position.

As with most things in life, a simple change of perspective can work wonders when it comes to, well, coming. Sexologist and co-founder of GoLove CBD lubricant Sadie Allison, PhD, recommended scooting to the edge of your bed, propping yourself in a doorway (bonus points here for the workout-masturbation combo), and yes, hopping into a steamy shower.

5. Tap into different kinds of sensations.

At its essence, sex is all about feeling things, so if you want to feel more, it only follows that you might try stimulating different senses (or the same senses, in new ways). Experimenting with temperature play, listening to audio erotica, or massaging in an arousal oil can all add different feelings to your self-pleasure time. You can even push the boundaries a little further by seeing what types of sensations you might inspire using everyday household objects, like a rubber band or a tissue, according to sexologist Shamyra Howard, LCSW.

6. And really tune into all those feelings.

It may seem like an obvious one, but if you’re at all distracted while masturbating, you’re bound to have a subpar experience—likely because of the mind’s major role as a sex organ. A small study analyzing the brain in people imagining sexual stimulation found that similar brain regions lit up in the same way as those who were engaging in actual self-stimulation. In fact, according to one of the study’s authors, neuroscientist and sex therapist Nan Wise, PhD, you may be able to bring on a stronger orgasm by actively turning your attention to the sexual moment at hand with a few slow, deep breaths.

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