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The subject of dating apps tends to be extremely polarizing: People seem to either have found the love of their life on them or have dealt with serious swiping burnout. Often, the process of finding a connection with a person seems random rather than identifiable or structured. However, the League, a dating app that has an application and screening process, might have pinpointed one thing that women in successful couples did on apps to increase their odds of finding a match.

In one of three heterosexual couples, the conversation was started by the woman. These women had three times the initiation rate than the app’s typical female user.

The League set up LeagueLove, a platform on which couples who have found success on the app can share their stories. After crunching the numbers and data offered by 100 couples who matched on the app and have been dating at least a year, according to Bustle, compelling key findings emerged: In one of three heterosexual couples, the introductory conversation was started by the woman, and these women initiated three times more conversations than the typical female user. But that doesn’t mean women were spending an inordinate amount of time crafting witty opening lines—they actually spent less time on the app than men did. So, ladies, don’t be shy about making the first move—over and over again.

Although heterosexual dating norms often seem like they’re from an entirely different era (some of them undoubtedly are), dating apps have carved a space where women in increasing numbers are comfortable superseding at least one of those standards. The dating app Bumble, on which heterosexual female users initiate conversation with the the male suitors, might have helped to popularize this growing pattern of female initiation, and new reports note Tinder may be following suit with an update to its model. So, it’s fair to assume we know who run the apps and will continue to do so. (Hint: #girls.)

And if these results prove anything, it’s that if at first you don’t succeed, try again. (But, if you can’t think of something to say, just send a GIF.)

Plus, here’s a matchmaker’s advice on how to find a partner and how French women date

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