The 1 crystal you need for each and every phase of dating and relationships


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Photo: Getty Images/Molly Aaker

There are many things in life that may change depending on your relationship status. To name just a few, consider your underwear choices, your most-used emojis, and your default Friday-night plans. But as it turns out, there’s also an argument for switching up your go-to crystals for relationships and love manifestation depending on what stage of a romantic relationship you’re currently in (or seeking).

That’s right, your trusty rose-quartz point isn’t necessarily the best crystal companion for every relationship milestone. But there’s sure to be a stone out there to help you get what you need, from the first date to the 500th. “Love can be complicated,” says Heather Askinosie, co-founder of Energy Muse and author of the new book Crystal365: Crystals for Everyday Life and Your Guide to Health, Wealth, and Balance. “Whatever stage you’re in during a relationship—beginning, end, or somewhere in-between—crystals can help you go deeper within the layers of yourself. They help you take time to reflect upon your past so you can let go of anything holding you back from the love you want and deserve.”

Crystals for relationships and love can also serve as a reminder of what you want from your future, Askinosie adds. “Once you set your mind to what you want, you can program your crystal for your specific intention. Your crystal then acts as a tool to remember your goal. [You can then] set yourself up for success in love and relationships by making the necessary shifts to see your wish come true.” After you’ve achieved your romantic objective, simply cleanse your crystal, store it, and move on to the stone that’s appropriate for the next chapter of your love story.

In Crystal365, Askinosie recommends crystal combinations for every possible relationship moment—as well as for things like career, money, and sleep. But here, she narrows it down to the one stone you should keep on hand whether you’re calling in a partner, deepening your relationship with them, or letting them go. Just remember one thing, she says: “It isn’t the crystal making the change, it’s you. Your crystal is there to support you on your journey.”

Below, find the best crystals for relationships and love—at every phase of the way.

rose quartz healing properties
Photo: Getty Images/JGI/Jamie Grill

When you’re extremely single: rose quartz

You knew rose quartz—one of the best-known crystals for relationships and love, celebrated for its ability to harmonize the heart chakra—would be on this list somewhere, right? In Askinosie’s opinion, the stone is a must-have for singles, especially in the current era of widespread dating-app disappointment.

“First, set your intention,” she says. “Hold it in your dominant hand over your heart and say, ‘I open my heart to attract love,’ six times. Then, place it in your bra or pocket to stay open.” Just make sure to discretely remove it before rounding second base—not that I’m speaking from experience, or anything.

Photo: Getty Images/benedek

When you’re newly dating someone: malachite

The early stages of dating can be both exhilarating and stressful. On the one hand, you’re still getting butterflies whenever you receive a text from the person—and on the other, you’re holding your breath, hoping neither of you does anything to mess it all up. For this uncertain phase, Askinosie recommends keeping malachite on hand.

“This heart-opening stone calls you out on old beliefs and patterns that have hindered love and successful relationships in the past,” she says. “It puts you on a new track, so you get clear on how you need to show up to the relationship in order for it to be successful.”

Photo: Getty Images/Moha El Jaw

When you’re in a long-term partnership: chrysoprase

One of the biggest challenges of an established partnership is remembering not to take one another for granted. If you feel like you might be devoting more attention to your Netflix queue than your S.O., Askinosie suggests reaching for a chunk of chrysoprase—a golden-green stone that’s said to bring more optimism, joy, and love into one’s life.

“Chrysoprase is great for connecting and being present in your relationship instead of thinking about other things,” she says. “On a date or while you share a meal, every time you want to grab your phone, grab your crystal instead.”

Photo: Getty Images/bjphotographs

When you’re going through conflict with your partner: golden healer

Arguments are an inevitable part of relationships, but Askinosie says golden healer—a type of quartz that looks, well, exactly as you’d imagine—is great for getting through tense moments relatively unscathed.

“It allows you to manage heated conversations in a healthier way and teaches you to stay calm and collected when conflicts arise,” she says. “Keep it in your living space so you can hold it during tough conversations.”

Photo: Getty Images/adomer

When you’re processing a breakup: rainbow obsidian

There’s nothing actually rainbow about this stone, but Askinosie swears rainbow obsidian is the perfect companion for navigating a tough breakup. “It allows you to grieve the loss of the relationship so you can release any damaging emotions and move on,” she says. “Lie on your back and place your rainbow obsidian over your heart for 11 minutes to grieve and process your emotions.” And maybe play Beyoncé’s “Irreplaceable” on repeat to dial up the empowering vibes.

Grab one of these crystals for protection and inner strength if your love life’s going through a rough patch. Just remember that the shape of your crystal matters, too—here’s how to find the right one for you.

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